Thursday, January 13, 2011

I'm Walking on Sunshine

I'm not even sure where to begin. My break was crammed full of family and friends, and a lot of lessons. I'm a student of life, what can I say? I got to spend a lot of time with family in Florida, where I let myself unwind and relax for the first time since May. By the time I got back home I was ready to juggle my friends and my homework.

It was a really odd sensation, knowing that this was the last significant break of my college experience. It was the last time I would be visiting home and seeing all these people that I grew up with while I didn't have any real world responsibility on my plate. The next time I go back, I won't technically live there anymore (unless I happen to need to work at home for 6 months to save up those elusive funds that will help me move to a large city and jump start this crazy career plan). And one year from now, all of my friends won't technically live there either. Real life is starting now, and it's just a whirlwind trying to emotionally and mentally keep up with all the new opportunities and ideas that are coming my way.

I had a lot of fun with my friends, and I realized this break how lucky I am to have such a large group of people that support me and each other. We've been together so long, and it gives me hope that we can continue to keep our friendships strong as we go our separate ways in life.

I saved some friendships that I was losing. I gained piece of mind. And I learned a lot this break about how to deal with situations that are out of my control. There's only so much a person can do, and the rest is up to others. I also learned that some things never change. I feel like a different person every time I come home, but that doesn't mean that I should expect others to be different. And it certainly doesn't mean that relationships always change or evolve.

Anyway, break was short lived and it relaxed me just enough to prepare me for this last semester ahead of me. I spent the week before school started back up preparing my monologue, and touring Kaitie around my hometown when she came to visit. We had the opportunity to speak to the high schoolers in the beginning theatre classes. I was surprised at how interested they were in what we had to say. They asked great questions about getting over stage fright, how to pick the right college for you, and about why theatre is important. Kaitie and I performed our monologue packages for them as well. I was surprised at myself because I wasn't nervous to perform in front of them, and it didn't occur to me until later that it was the first acting my old teacher had seen me do since high school. I think he enjoyed it, which was nice. And he had nothing but beautiful things to say about me to his classes, which made me even more grateful that I came from such an amazing place. My theatre background is so different than most of my classmates, and I've truly started to appreciate that.

The theatre productions class was preparing their competition play, The Importance of Being Earnest. The teacher asked if we would mind giving advice about the dialect to her class. We went through a couple drills, and somehow I ended up performing for them as well. They also had great questions about college, and about college theatre, and theatre in the real world. I felt really influential, because I was able to tell them important things that I wish someone had told me in high school about what I was getting myself into. They have so much ahead of them, and my high school brings out so many talented individuals that understand hard work and what it's like to be part of a family. They have so many great things ahead of them, and I believe they're going to be great! I wish them all the success in the world.

I realized that that would be the last visit to the high school where I would know the students. The seniors were the freshmen when I graduated, so the next time I go back, I won't personally know anyone. Scary.

So I tripped back to college on Sunday in the crazy snowy weather. (Side Note: we have gotten so much snow! And apparently we might get more this weekend. I'm not sure I can handle this. I was pretty sure my limit was receiving an email about ways to prevent frostbite). I cleaned up my apartment Monday and made sure I had my monologue down pat. I also saw Black Swan on Monday night, and it was phenomenal. I found the movie scary as a performer, because it showcases the worst about being an artist. It delves into the pressure and competition of wanting and performing a role, as well as the need to be perfect and the constant need to be noticed or validated by your peers and superiors for your talent. I also found the idea of transforming into your role a scary concept, because it can happen so easily if you don't keep yourself under control. I've experienced slight versions of this. During Rabbit Hole when I never had a break from my character because of the work hours and the rehearsal process, I was horrible to my friends at Boji. The character of Becca was so lost and desperate to find her way back to normal, and I definitely lashed out at people in real life while I was struggling to understand her. The movie just reinforced for me how important it is to understand the concept of losing yourself in a role as an acting method.

Tuesday was the first day of classes. I was introduced to the various great comics of our time and before in my Acting for Comedy class. We spoke about what is funny to our generation, and the ways that comedy has changed over the years. Yesterday in the class, we delivered one liners and practiced landing a joke. Our assignment for next class is to come in with a 5 joke set for a stand up routine. I'm freaking out about this class because I've never thought of myself as particularly funny. However, my mindset for this semester is to have no fear. It doesn't matter if I'm not good at it, it only matters that I try to do my best work every time I get up there. I'm terrified as well, because Professor L (the teacher of the class and the director of the upcoming and last mainstage show Clean House) has told us that the auditions for her show for certain characters will including a standup routine or the telling of jokes. I better prepare myself.

The thing about comedy is that it makes you so vulnerable in a different way than drama. You have to put yourself out there and hope for an audible response. ...Words cannot express how I feel about this.

I also had Creating Online Media. The professor explained that this class will be about creating a website using Photoshop and Dreamweaver. Sound familiar? It did to me, because that's what I spent last semester teaching myself. Imagine my surprise. But I decided to keep the class and not drop it because I'm going to get to learn how to code my own site, instead of build it using a template, and that is knowledge I just can't pass up!

Monday afternoon I performed my monologue for Sense and Sensibility auditions. I felt great about it! I used the techniques I learned last semester in the monologue class. I had action all the way throughout, so there was a forward motion to the words I was saying, and I made it very conversational. Director B (also Professor B who has taught me Theatre History, Greek Acting, and Monologues for anyone who cares to put a letter with a class) told me that I would be called back and that she would be having me read for the character Elinor. I was excited because that was the character I was most interested in.

On Wednesdays I only have one class at noon--Dramatic Lit. Dramatic Literature is just going to be reading great plays and giving presentations on them. Nothing too different from last semester's Shakespeare Lit class. It's going to be fun, but not terribly exciting.

Wednesday afternoon I had callbacks. First I read with Megan, a 2nd year on the Warehouse Board who I've never had the opportunity to work with. I was so excited! We read a great Elinor/Lucy scene that Professor B said she really enjoyed. She gave me another Elinor scene to read with Erin as the mother. I love reading with Erin because we build really well off of each other. I also hadn't had the chance to work with her since Acting III and The Laramie Project. We had an even better read than my first one, and after we were done Director B took our scripts and said, "We better stop there; you can't get any better than that."

Callbacks are always my favorite part of the audition process. I came back to the room feeling like I had done the best audition I'd ever done at college. I worked so hard to fit a specific character, which honestly isn't something I'd done before. Usually I try to fit as many characters as I can so that way a director sees that I can adapt easily to roles. But this time I chose a part and I fought for it. I was proud of my night, but a little terrified because I had finally put myself out there. It's so easy to handle rejection when you tell yourself that you don't care if you get cast. I've been using that method since I got to college. This was the first time I truly told myself that I wanted a role and I knew I would be upset if I didn't get cast.

To my surprise and absolute happiness I did get cast! As Elinor! I couldn't be more excited to work with the talented cast that was also picked. There are so many people that I haven't had the pleasure to work with yet this year, especially the men because I haven't been on the mainstage yet this year. I'm especially excited to work with my 'love interest' because he's a first year boy in his first main role and we're going to have a blast! There's a swing cast that gets a Thursday performance, as well. At our read through last night, the main cast switched off reading with the swing cast so everyone had the opportunity to flesh out their characters and get a feel for the words.

A period piece is always a little slow going at first, because the language is easy to trip over. I'm excited to see this show pick up. Sometime this weekend, some of the cast is going to get together and watch the mini-series of the Masterpiece Classic as character research. I love cast bonding.

Oddly enough I have no rehearsal today, and Monday is a holiday so no rehearsal then either. I have a long four days to help me start memorizing. I also need to spend a lot of time this weekend working on my PR poster for the next Warehouse show which auditions next week: The Young and the Fair. Also this weekend are auditions for our 2 off the walls: the combat show Women Fight Against and the sketch/student written 33 in 66. A busy, busy weekend for sure. Today is my first day of Acting for the Camera, and I'm excited to be back in the classroom with Professor D.

So, all in all, I had a fabulous break with my amazing family and friends. I learned a lot of great life lessons and a lot about myself as a person. I've freaked out about my future (did I forget to mention that part). I've become excited about my future (there, that's better). And I've gotten cast. Great start to my last semester? Yes!

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