Friday, September 13, 2013

That something, that magic

Lately I've been getting little flashes of this amazing feeling. It's a feeling I forgot I could feel. Because it happens so seldom, it normally makes me feel nostalgic. But it's been occurring more and more often lately, and I can only hope that I can relearn to grasp it fully.

It's the way I used to feel at Stephens College. I'd wake up every morning knowing that I had somehow been lucky enough to find exactly where I belonged. I had a beautiful artistic family, and every class I took, every conversation I had, and every single moment I spent in those three years felt as if I was accomplishing something important and meaningful. I was impacting the people around me, and they were impacting me. I was so open.

Graduating was an adjustment, certainly. And I've never lost my passion for acting in the time I've sent out of school. But it's only recently that I seem to have rekindled that magical feeling of doing work that's important. To me, and potentially to other people. I walk the halls of TPS during rehearsals and I can hear other actors rehearsing their work and I think "How lucky am I to be surrounded by people who understand that what they do is important?"

Truly, how many people in the world think that their job matters? How many people work for more than a paycheck? How many people live their life in pursuit of something so intangible, but so powerful and overwhelming that they know they can't do anything else? I'm sure there are many. Politicians, scientists, researchers, teachers, and the people who discover new things every day.

It feels like magic when there's that moment in your day that reminds you that you're exactly where you should be, doing exactly what you should be doing. Right now, it's only a moment. It used to be a constant. I strive to rediscover the constant! It happens the more I push myself; the harder and deeper I throw myself into something new. And I love every second of it. Here's to the magic.