This has been an eye-opening month.
Last week I had a difficult decision to make that took me a couple (much needed) days to decipher. I had accepted a wonderful opportunity of a show. It was going to teach me new skills and introduce me to new people. I had the chance to work with some people I've worked with before. I felt grateful that i had finally been allowed a chance to approach improv work, and do more comedy. On the other hand, I was noticing some auditions coming up for shows and films that were much more up my alley genre-wise. They were the types of theatre and film that I've always wanted to pursue, the kind that I want people to see on my resume because I think they represent the kind of artist I want to be. They were the kind I started doing theatre for--the kind I fell in love with.
When I finally started looking at the situation in this light, my decision became the slightest bit easier. Which isn't saying much because it was really hard for me to make. I've never turned down a role before--and it's not something I would ever recommend doing. It can breed poor relationships and break reputations. However, I think it's important for an actor to know what they want and have the courage to follow through and do what is best for their career. I hadn't started rehearsals for the show I had 'accepted', and I hadn't signed an official contract--does that make it ok? No.
There comes a time in every actor's journey though (for some only once, for others much more often) where they have to make a difficult decision between jobs. An actor only hopes that they can handle the situation with compassion, professionalism, and a good degree of contrition. After all, you have caused a step back in some one else's plans. At the same time, you have given some one else an opportunity to play a role you couldn't accept.
For me, it isn't something I will do often. I had such a difficult struggle doing it this time. I can say with confidence though, that I feel I made the right decision for myself. It took me a while to figure out that money wasn't the factor in my decision that I was worried about. It all came down to the kind of theatre and film I love to do. Of course I hope to have many opportunities that teach me new things and help me grow as an actor, but this wasn't my turn. My turn will come again.
On another note:
I attended a master class called Playing Pinter that I had signed up for almost three months ago. It was a truly inspiring experience. Henry Woolf (Pinter's longest friend) taught the class. He spent a good hour telling us stories of he and Pinter growing up, how they came to be the artists that they were, and the way that the times affected their work and careers. My how times have changed. Mr. Woolf was easily one of the funniest men I've had the pleasure of meeting.
The class itself was about Pinter's work and the difficulties of approaching his style, and how he preferred it done in his lifetime. It was incredibly enlightening and I took a copious amount of notes on the subject which I probably won't transfer here because it would take a long time.
In the end, I was paired with a scene partner and we were given the chance to rehearse and perform A Kind of Alaska. It was a very emotionally charged scene, and we were given minimal blocking to work with. It was really fun to just stretch my dramatic muscles after so long. In fact, it felt great. My partner was extremely talented, and we had a great time piecing it together and giving it a go with the rest of the class. Everyone received different scenes and then we all performed for each other. Mr. Woolf was happy that we had taken some of what he said to heart as a class, and seemed to enjoy the work.
It was a really enjoyable experience not only because I had a great time acting, but because I got to feel one step removed from an amazing man. Just hearing the stories and all about the relationship between the two men was fascinating. And I learned a lot about Pinter's work. I'd love to do more of it.
In other news tomorrow begins the final weekend of Shrew. I'm sad to see it go, but after a six week run and with so many auditions happening around town, it seems that everyone feels content to leave the summer behind with the fondest of memories to think back on. It's been a great ride, and I'll be sure to put up a list of all the things I've learned after this crazy summer with this awesome cast!
Here's our most recent review: http://gscheiderer.blogspot.com/2012/08/photo-ken-holmes-greenstage-enjoying.html
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